I've just been thinking a lot; about the blog, about my maybe/possible/hopefully-coming-along photography business, and of course, a lot about Austin.
I'll start with my photography business.
First I need a name for the bis', which I'm honestly thinking about sticking with slhallphotography. It's the name I've been water-marking my photos with that I take...and it's my name, so it's copy-righted on it's own. I don't have to jump through so many hoops to get my business's official name. And then there's the buying of the equipment if this is what I'm pursuing. I've been thinking about taking out a loan from a local business and getting what I need and paying it off as I go. I'll get my equipment on time, and I'll be building my credit early. Gotta start somewhere.
Which brings me to the blog.
Winging It is made as a journal and whatever-you-want-to-call-it for the relationship between Austin and I. It's to help support other military girlfriends, fiances and spouses. It relieves a lot of stress when I write about what's bothering me, or what's upsetting me in my life. Well, I need a website for my photography business. So do I make a regular website and link this blog to it, or do I make a new blog...? In addition to this one? Because I want to keep a little bit of the "military girlfriend" theme on my photography's website page too. If just to make me more original (and to keep myself interested). I don't know if I could just post pictures in the blog by itself.
I would stop altogether eventually. So those are some thoughts about that...
And then there's Austin. He hasn't done anything, he's been an angel. I just miss him. I just saw him Easter Sunday, but for some reason...I've just been feeling this...heartache for him. This mysterious feeling. It's not normal. I mean, I miss him every single day...but never all chest-achy like this every day. I've felt like this for a week now. I've prayed on it countless times; asked God for strength if that's what I needed, asked for guidance and even just asked Him (if it's in His will) to just make it stop. It comes everyday, all day.
Austin is where he's always been: North Carolina. I'm working, doing school work, and everything I usually do. Nothing out of the norm....so I don't know. Stupid mysterious feeling. He's leaving for California to train for a month or two in May...then I know deployment isn't far away...maybe that's it. I honestly don't know.
I just hope this mysterious feeling goes away. Soon. Like now, please?
I actually cried today. I heard Keith Urban's song "For You" and the tears just came. Stupid woman hormones. Stupid song. Stupid mysterious feeling.
If any of the ladies feel like letting a few water-works loose, here's the video for the song:
I only just noticed it was on the end of "Act Of Valor". (Which if you haven't watched, you need to) That movie made me cry too. I'm just a mess lately. It's almost pathetic, I'm so girly. I swear, I'm usually better about all this...
Well, thanks for reading, I'm off to kill some things on Fallout 3 and regain some of my...dignity.
**Oh, yes, I've added a few definitions to the Marine Jibberish Page! ;)
-Sarah
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